"A gardener, whose attention is ever on the spontaneities of nature, acquires the gift of seeing differences, looks always for the merest changes in plant growth, or in the composition of the soil, the emerging populations of insects and earthworms. So will gardeners, as parents, see changes of the smallest subtlety in their children, or as teachers see the signs of an increasing skill, and possibly wisdom, in their students. A garden, a family, a classroom—any place of human gathering whatsoever—will offer no end of variations to be observed, each an arrow pointing toward yet more changes. But these observed changes are not theatrically amusing to genuine gardeners; they dramatically open themselves to a renewed future.
So, too, with those who look everywhere for difference, who see the earth as source, who celebrate the genius in others, who are not prepared against but for surprise." - James Carse (Finite and Infinite Games)
We are who we choose to be
It is difficult to endure failure. This is why many people would rather avoid assuming more responsibilities whilst not knowing that they could be teaching an important lesson to themselves. The mind is spontaneously learning from experience through logical assumptions. As Emile Durkheim would say, the search for meaning will never stop.
The personality is a result of the learning patterns we have acquired throughout our life. Thus, if you choose to avoid responsibility then you will never understand what is like to take life in your own hands and you will end up becoming dependent on others, less motivated and insecure.
The most distressing experiences in life arise from the moments when we know that our actions are not in line with our aspirations and yet we find it hard to steer the wheel in the right direction. Consequently we might attempt to make rational choices, to deny responsibility, to distract ourselves or to change our behaviour so that we may feel better about our decisions. Welcome to the path of least resistance. You are allowed to move forward as long as you can find a good excuse for not leaving the comfort zone. But wait, observe the pressure. The sense of boredom, disappointment or fulfillment, these are the most demanding feelings that may remind you of your struggles in one or more areas of life.
But why does it hurt to avoid responsibility? What is so wrong about doing the same thing again and again? After all, we are the same person. Avoidance provides the perfect scenario to live an isolated existence and so stay in a world that stops evolving. But does such a world exist? Not at all. Life is part of nature, and nature is providing some of the most remarkable signs for evolution.
Are you able to balance your priorities, to find the value of your hidden skills or to understand the meaning of your life? The only pressure that we won’t be able to handle is the one we don’t understand. Take the life assessment and find the right clues for self-development in the six areas of life. Click this link to be taken to the questionnaire.