"A gardener, whose attention is ever on the spontaneities of nature, acquires the gift of seeing differences, looks always for the merest changes in plant growth, or in the composition of the soil, the emerging populations of insects and earthworms. So will gardeners, as parents, see changes of the smallest subtlety in their children, or as teachers see the signs of an increasing skill, and possibly wisdom, in their students. A garden, a family, a classroom—any place of human gathering whatsoever—will offer no end of variations to be observed, each an arrow pointing toward yet more changes. But these observed changes are not theatrically amusing to genuine gardeners; they dramatically open themselves to a renewed future.
So, too, with those who look everywhere for difference, who see the earth as source, who celebrate the genius in others, who are not prepared against but for surprise." - James Carse (Finite and Infinite Games)
Stay committed to yourself
A recent Forbes article claims that in 2015, on average 86% of people reported making a commitment for self-improvement. At this stage, it is important for us to educate ourselves as self-development becomes a social value in itself.
When deciding to engage in a process of self-development you must stay committed. A psychological intervention is not just about scheduling a number of insightful meetings, but will require you to observe, accept and modify your frame of mind.
Every observation happens in the present moment. So stop for a while, step back from planning the next achievement and look towards your inner self. What do you see? Everything you keep hidden deep inside is a result of the way you choose to live your life. Your strengths are as valuable as your weaknesses. They are the fuel for your motivation and also the threshold you need to challenge in order to see yourself in a better light.
Perhaps now you might find it easier to accept who you are. “You can’t CHANGE yourself”, many people claim. This is the most foolish goal people strive to achieve. We can but develop. Life is rooted in our genes, so start and make a better choice and tame that little inner voice.
Be kind with yourself. You might be using an aggressive approach, while setting high expectations that you don’t actually believe in. At this point, your mind might let you down, entering in a process of conflict with reality, embracing all doubts instead of finding new hopes for you to trust.